I was in a box and didn’t know it.
I really liked the box. It was comfortable and safe. I knew the corners and the sides. Whatever was happening outside of it didn’t matter because all I needed, or so I thought, was what was inside…
…until one day I saw a small glimmer of light shining through a tiny hole.
I tried to patch the hole with tape and glue and fabric. For years, I would patch the hole and then inevitably the light would shine through again. Eventually, I couldn’t ignore the hole anymore. So, I poked at it a bit to see what was outside of the box. I couldn’t see much initially, but eventually, the hole got bigger and the light got brighter.
With every brave, but small, exploration, the hole continued to grow. And then more holes started appearing. I tried to tape some of them while poking at others. As my courage grew and my knowledge of what was outside the box increased, I started making my own holes!
What’s over here? What happens when I look over here? What might I see if I poke in this spot?
And then? Then it was fun. I was poking and ripping and shredding so that all of the light could stream in. I wanted to burst out because I realized I had been SO. CONSTRAINED. The box was starting to burst at the seems as I was growing bigger, more effervescent, more certain and more…me.
You see, one tiny hole in what I thought felt safe (and was never safe to begin with), allowed me to start to explore the edges. I explored the edges of the box while discovering just how small it had become for me. What else was there that I hadn’t seen? Turns out – there was a LOT!
Eventually, I started to feel that the box wasn’t a box but rather a cage. I began to see so much more light and yet I was still stuck and I couldn’t find my way out. I also convinced myself I wasn’t ready to be on the outside. What was out there was scary and unknown and it was safer to be small and squished.
Not only could I see outside now but the outside started to see in! They started to see parts of me that had been hidden and quieted, and even when I wasn’t always ready to show all of those parts, I really liked how the light brightened them. It was so much easier seeing and being seen, even though the flimsy walls that felt safe were no longer there.
I grew more comfortable with what my intuition told me was there all along. Now I was exploring and exposing and exposed, and I felt so constrained by the cage because it wasn’t big enough for me. I felt like I was spilling out of it through every opening and I wanted so badly to be let free.
And now I’m free. I’m grateful for the box, and I’m appreciative of that first pesky hole.
Everyone has a box around some part of them that’s just waiting to be let out.
Let’s connect. Let me show you what it looks like outside of your box. Let’s explore the edges. It’s beautiful out here!