If you’re someone who struggles to prioritize self-care, this is for you.
Ask yourself: How can I take care of the most important people in my life (my kids, my clients, my partner, my parents, my staff/team, etc…) if I’m not taking care of myself?
“But I feel guilty taking time for myself”.
“But I don’t have the time/money/support/resources to take time for myself.”
“But I can’t with my job/my kids/my partner/my life.”
YES. YOU. CAN. It’s that simple, actually. If you believe you can’t, then you won’t. If you believe there’s a better way and you’ll find it, then you will. And there is a better way.
Self-care doesn’t have to be expensive, or time-consuming. It doesn’t even have to happen alone. But it does take discipline. It takes boundaries. It takes getting rid of the bullshit excuses. It takes communication. It takes reprioritizing the to-do list, and even making a to-don’t list. It takes saying some NOs so that you can say more YESES to what you want and need.
It might be time to shed the guilt of doing something for yourself. It’s not selfish. It’s self-ish. It’s choosing to invest in yourself SO THAT you can show up for others.
A struggling client of mine (single mom, unhappy at her job and feeling stuck) recently decided to embrace this idea of living self-ishly. She started getting up early to walk on the treadmill regularly. She got into the office a little earlier, and left a little earlier. Weekends have become more focused on family time – not work time sprinkled with family time. She’s choosing to invest in her best self. Not only is she modeling this behavior for her son, she’s actually found herself more refreshed and engaged at work, more energized and more confident.
Getting some alone time, taking a break from the mental load, getting extra help with the kids – these are things you can give yourself permission to do more than once a year on Mother’s Day or Father’s Day. You don’t have to wait 364 more days to find a little time to take care of you.
Communicate what you need. Draw boundaries around protected resources that fuel you. Find a few more places to say NO so that you can say YES – to yourself, and to those around you.
It might just mean that you’re able to show up bigger and brighter for the most important people in your life, including yourself.