The good news: I wasn’t lying to myself anymore.
The bad news: I didn’t have a clue where to begin.
I’d been trained in coaching basics years earlier at NYU. I’d coached a ton at work over the years. Was launching a coaching practice as simple as just starting my own thing?
If only.
I decided it was probably smart to dip my toe into the water (while still working my corporate job) before I dove in, headfirst. So, I did some research, picked an accredited coaching certification program… and then…
I delayed.
After a few weeks, I got antsy and decided to learn more about the program. So, I made a phone call to the admissions director.
“I’d like to know what it looks like to start this program in about 6 months from now,” I said.
She laughed.
“What’s going to change between now and then?” she asked me.
Nothing, I realized.
My first day in class I knew I’d made the right decision. I was exactly where I was meant to be. Everything made sense.
I got paired with a coach who helped me articulate what I wanted. She pushed me. She asked me powerful questions. She gave me space to process with honesty exactly what I wanted, what I needed, and how I’d get there.
And she heard every single one of my deepest fears:
“What if no one wants to work with me?”
“Who walks away from a growing and successful career?”
“I’m not cut out for this.”
“Maybe this is a mid-life crisis and I should just wait it out?”
The list went on and on.
As this was happening, very few people knew what I was actually doing. And I had a damn good reason why not. This dream was SO big and I’d dreamt it for SO long that I felt very protective of my journey.
I only shared what I was doing with a few very close friends and family members. I only wanted people who were going to cheerlead and champion. I had enough naysaying in my own brain and I didn’t need anyone else’s. One day my BFF said to me, “you’ve had this whisper of a dream for a long time and now it’s getting noisier.”
She was right. I couldn’t quiet it anymore.
I spent about a year working through all of my thoughts. My fears. My mindset. The roadblocks that I was putting in my own way. I took action steps every. single. day. I did my coursework. I practiced. I sought out tough feedback.
Working with my skills performance coach was like getting punched in the face and then asking to keep fighting. I wanted more. At some point in the journey, momentum kicked in. I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience. Things kept moving. I didn’t overthink anymore. I just did it because it felt good. It felt right.
I felt my life changing as I was learning how to help others change theirs.
As I neared the date I had set for myself to make a “final” decision to leave my job and launch my business, I felt both exhilarated and sick. What would I say to my colleagues? How many people would I disappoint? Is my boss gonna hate me? My team resent me? My friends tell me I’d lost my mind?
Turns out, all of the fears I’d had about resigning weren’t real. When I told them what I was doing, I received nothing but support. Everyone told me some version of “It’s about time” or “I can’t wait to work with you in this way.”
That’s how I took the plunge and launched my coaching practice. That’s how I changed my life.
How would you like to change yours?
Stay tuned for Part 3, next week.