I read something recently about high performers at work and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it because I hear it in my practice, too, almost daily.
If you’re someone who shows up fully at work, leads people, drives results, and then comes home to lead a whole other life with kids, schedules, emotions, and logistics, you already know this, but sometimes it helps to know you’re not alone!
Here’s the gist: High performers need more support than anyone realizes. Not less because of years of experience or a bigger title, or a team, or because you’re called Mom or Dad.
Since you’re reading this, I’m guessing you are the person people rely on.
At work. At home. Everywhere.
You’re the one who figures it out. Keeps things moving. Handles things before they become problems.
And from the outside, it probably looks like you’ve got it handled.
But inside, we both know you’re doing the mental math constantly.
Am I giving enough at work?
Am I present enough at home?
Am I doing any of this well?
And the answer is never a resounding YES!
High performers don’t burn out because they can’t handle hard things. It’s the opposite! They burn out because they keep handling hard things.
Without the right kind of support. Without space to recalibrate.
Without anyone really asking, “Hey, how are you actually doing?”
And if you’re being honest, you don’t always ask yourself that either.
You don’t have time! There’s always something more important. Slowing down feels like falling behind.
Here’s a reframe I want you to sit with.
What if the goal isn’t to do more, better, faster?
What if the goal is to lead yourself with the same level of intention that you lead everything else?
Why?
Because your kids don’t need you to be perfect.
Your team doesn’t need you to be everything.
And you do not need to earn your worth by holding it all together.
Just because you keep grinding hard as long as they’ll let you is not what makes you the highest performer. The highest performer is the one who can sustain. The one who asks for real feedback, expects things to make sense, and recognizes that support isn’t a luxury but rather it’s what keeps everything from falling apart.
Stop wondering if you’re doing any of it well. That’s not the right question to ask.
Instead, ask yourself:
Where am I trying to carry this alone when I don’t actually have to?
Start there.